Why Moms Are Mentally Exhausted: The Invisible Mental Load of Motherhood
7/13/202623 min
Ever feel like your brain has 47 tabs open at all times? Same.
This week Sarah and Whitney are talking about the invisible mental load moms carry every single day — the constant remembering, planning, anticipating, organizing, managing emotions, and making decisions for everyone around us.
From school forms and meal planning to emotional regulation and “default parent” responsibilities, motherhood is mentally exhausting in ways people don’t always see. And sometimes it’s not the big things that break us… it’s one more person asking us one more question after making 10,000 decisions already that day.
They discuss:
- decision fatigue in motherhood
- why moms feel overstimulated
- invisible labor and emotional load
- perfectionism and over-functioning
- why we struggle to delegate
- practical ways to reduce mental overload
If you’ve been feeling mentally drained, snappy, numb, overstimulated, or like your brain never shuts off…this episode will make you feel seen.
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Clips
Transcript preview
First 90 secondsSarah Parkhurst· Host0:00
[gentle music] Hi, guys. Welcome back to Thriving Alliance podcast. This is Sarah, and I've got our favorite maternal mental health therapist, Whitney. Hi, Whitney.
Whitney Gay· Host0:16
Hey, friends.
Sarah Parkhurst· Host0:18
We are full-blown in summer.
Whitney Gay· Host0:20
Woo.
Sarah Parkhurst· Host0:21
Um, so we know that summer brings new challenges. It is the hustle and bustle of the school year, and, like, the school sports and all that stuff. Or if you have school-age kids, it's simmered down, but you're probably feeling like an Uber driver of camps and figuring out, "What am I gonna do- Yes ... with my child? How do I function?" And then, if you have littles or you're postpartum, it's super hot in a lot of places and, you know- Yeah ... you can only be outside for a few hours of the day, and then the days can feel really extra long.
Whitney Gay· Host0:49
Right. Well, and, you know, the sun is out for much longer, so the days are longer, but also our kids are not gonna go to bed when it's bright outside.
Sarah Parkhurst· Host0:58
No, no. I mean, uh- Like, why would they go to bed at 8:30 when the sun is out?
Whitney Gay· Host1:02
That's silly.
Sarah Parkhurst· Host1:03
[laughs] You know, there is only so much that darkening shades and curtains can do, which they do a lot for us in our household, so we're very appreciative. But it is- Right ... always that question of, you know, the summer days feel hard. And you're always looking ahead, and- Right ... if your kids are home more, or say they are, you're, are navigating a different schedule, that's oftentimes that we find just, like, the mental decision fatigue can really- Right ... start