The Follow-Up: Perinatal Rage
7/13/202611 min
So many moms feel they must always be gentle, patient, and nurturing. When intense irritability, sudden anger, or rage bubbles up during pregnancy or the postpartum period, it’s easy to suffer in silence out of fear of judgment. Dr. Mona and Dr. Ashurina pull back the curtain on why parental rage happens, how to recognize the clinical signs of a flooded nervous system, and why getting help early—before reaching a crisis point—is the best thing you can do for yourself and your family.
Here are the key takeaways from this episode:
- Perinatal Rage is Wrapped in Shame: Many mothers suffer in silence because societal expectations dictate that moms should always be gentle, patient, and nurturing, making it incredibly difficult to admit to feeling intense anger or rage.
- It Can Start During Pregnancy: Mood shifts and anxiety during the perinatal period are often incorrectly dismissed as "just hormones," but symptoms of depression, anxiety, and rage can actively begin during pregnancy.
- Depression Doesn't Always Look Like Sadness: Perinatal and postpartum depression can manifest as extreme irritability, hostility, snapping, and yelling over minor incidents rather than just tearfulness or isolation.
- Driven by Overstimulation and Unmet Needs: Rage is rarely a standalone issue; it is typically a combination of extreme sleep deprivation, sensory burnout, and unmet basic needs like adequate nutrition, rest, or feeling seen and validated.
- Don't Wait for a Crisis to Get Help: You do not need to be in an absolute crisis to benefit from mental health support; seeking out a therapist early makes navigating care much easier and helps you recover before reaching a breaking point.
Want more? Listen to the full, original episode.
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Clips
Transcript preview
First 90 secondsMona Amin· Host0:00
Welcome to The Follow-Up. [upbeat music] I'm Dr. Mona, your online pediatrician and mom friend, and this is your Monday reset where we revisit a favorite episode of the PedsDocTalk podcast in less time than it takes you to count to 10 before you snap again. I've been there. [laughs] Last Wednesday, I released an episode with Cassidy Friedas about her new book, Mom Needs a Moment, on how to stop your reaction before it starts and become a calmer, happier, more connected parent. That episode hit home for so many of you, make sure you get her book, and it made me realize this one was worth bringing back, too. Because before you can do the work of becoming calmer, you have to understand the why behind rage, if you have it, and accept it, because that's actually happening to you. That is something I have worked through myself, and it's a big part of why this conversation matters so much to me and why I wanted to bring it back. So today, we're revisiting my talk with Dr. Ashiri Nareem, a licensed clinical psychologist, mom, and founder of PsychMommy, on what perinatal rage is, why it shows up, how it shows up, how to know when you need support, and how to actually put words to it with the people that you love so that they can support you. And if you love this follow-up episode, which I think you will, go download the full episode that's in our show notes and do the whole drill. Subscribe to the show, subscribe on YouTube, download, download, download, and share this episode on social and tag us at the PedsDocTalk podcast, at PedsDocTalk,

