The End Is Here w/ Ari Shaffir
4/20/20261 hr 12 min
The End is Ari's new storytelling show! And it's finally here! Only at https://theend.ymhstudios.com/ . Get 7 full, hour long episodes of completely unfiltered stories for $29.99. Get it now!
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Clips
Transcript preview
First 90 secondsBert Kreischer· Host0:00
This is the best vodka in the world. You're talking to a man who's put 10,000 hours into a couple things: eating pussy and drinking vodka. [laughs] I'll bring my wife in if you want. I'm pretty good at the first one, too. But this is better than pussy. This is the best vodka you're ever gonna have. It's clean. I sleep gort- my sleep score is through the roof because of it. It tastes clean. [laughs] Everyone I've given it to loves this vodka. Tom, tell him.
Tom Segura· Host0:18
It's absolutely fantastic. We have a proprietary distillation process. And listen, we are winning competitions. We have gold medals in various competitions. And honestly, you the people are the ones telling us how great it is, too. This is not just smoke that we're blowing here. We're telling you because you're telling us this is now your favorite vodka. So thank you, and if you haven't tried Porosos, get out to the store. Uh, if you, they don't, if they don't carry it, tell them you want them to carry it.
Bert Kreischer· Host0:45
Tell them. Request it. When you go to the bar you say, "Hey, do you carry Porosos?" And if they say no, you go, "You should. It's pretty fricking awesome."
Tom Segura· Host0:52
And then walk out.
Bert Kreischer· Host0:52
You know what I do?
Tom Segura· Host0:54
Hmm.
Bert Kreischer· Host0:55
I go, "Do you carry Porosos?" And they say no, I bring out a bottle and give it to them. I go, "Now you do."
Tom Segura· Host0:58
That's awesome.
Bert Kreischer· Host0:58
"Can I get a bottle, a glass of Porosos?"
Tom Segura· Host1:00
[laughs] That's awesome. That's awesome.
Bert Kreischer· Host1:01
100%. [laughs] Cheers.
Tom Segura· Host1:04
Welcome to another episode of Two Bears One Cave. We're here in Austin, Texas, and joining us is somebody who wants to erase the people of Palestine. [laughs] Give it up for Ari Shaffir, everybody.
Ari Shaffir· Guest1:18
Thank you. It's not... Please, uh [laughs] [laughs] [laughs] I think it's already accomplished.
Tom Segura· Host1:23
Let's, uh [laughs] [laughs] [laughs] Let's, um, let's- It's like saying Stephen King wants to write a book.