Mom Needs a Moment: Why You Still Yell Even When You Know Better (And How to Stop) with Dr. Cassidy Freitas
7/8/20261 hr 2 min
Have you read all the parenting books, followed the expert social media accounts, and known exactly what you want to say to your child—only to find yourself frustrated and yelling in the heat of the moment? You are not alone.
In this episode, I welcome back licensed therapist, author, and crowd-favorite social media follower, Dr. Cassidy Freitas. Together, we take the shame out of "mom rage" and explore the painful gap between knowing what to do and actually doing it when it matters most. Dr. Cassidy dives into the core concepts of her new book, Mom Needs a Moment, explaining how our childhood "rulebooks," sensory overload, and a lack of societal "margins" trigger our nervous systems into survival mode. Tune in to learn how to catch your triggers, build a buffer between stimulus and reaction, and use the ultimate parenting superpower: the power of repair.
In this episode, we cover:
- The deep shame mothers face when they know the right parenting techniques but still find themselves yelling in moments of frustration.
- How Dr. Cassidy pulled together a decade of clinical themes and personal experiences as a mother of three to write her new book, Mom Needs a Moment.
- How childhood survival "rulebooks" and an overstimulated nervous system cause parents to default to reactive habits like fight, flight, or freeze.
- The desperate need for modern parents to consciously protect empty "margins" of space on their calendars to regulate their bodies outside of stressful moments.
- A powerful look at how breaking generational cycles allows parents to build a lasting emotional legacy for future generations.
Connect with Dr. Cassidy Freitas on Instagram @drcassidy, visit her site https://www.drcassidymft.com/ and buy her new book: https://go.shopmy.us/p-69435027 (paid link)
Check out our earlier episode on EMDR: https://pedsdoctalk.com/podcast/trauma-therapy-why-you-may-need-emdr/
00:00 - Introduction & The Parenting Gap
01:54 - EMDR Therapy & Processing Motherhood
03:49 - A Psychic Medium's Prediction & Toxic Perfectionism
06:33 - Impact vs. Notoriety
08:55 - How the Book Got Its Title
11:31 - The Overstimulated Digital Parenting Era
13:40 - Why Do We Snap? (The Survival Rulebook)
19:57 - Dr. Mona’s Instagram Troll Trigger
22:59 - Why Insight Alone Isn't Enough to Change Behavior
24:42 - What Are Margins? (Before, During, & After)
32:50 - The Chocolate Popsicle Story
37:46 - The Power of a Child Expecting Repair
42:20 - ADHD, Hyperfocus, and Managing Interruptions
43:53 - Breaking Generational Cycles Without Blame
49:27 - Reclaiming Your Intuition
52:24 - Building Legacy & Finding Joy
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Clips
Transcript preview
First 90 secondsSpeaker 10:00
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Cassidy Freitas· Guest0:29
You have to find ways to protect these margins as if they are as important as your child's very important doctor's appointment, because you having the space to regulate your nervous system, to process all the things that are coming at you, is... What that brings to your kid in terms of, like, their development and their overall wellbeing and health is just as important.
Mona Amin· Host0:53
[upbeat music] Have you ever known exactly what you wanted to say to your child, had the words all lined up in your head, and then the moment got loud, and all of a sudden, everything went out the window? It's happened to me. Why does that gap exist between knowing what to do and actually doing it when your kid is melting down in the cereal aisle or not listening to you for the 17th time? And why does it feel like your body reacts before your brain even gets a chance? I'm writing a book now all about limits and setting boundaries, and one of my chapters is about