I love you but I hate your politics

5/18/202626 min

You've found your person, but you can't stand their politics. Awks! It's a phenomenon that's been on the rise in the last 30 years. Around the world, women are increasingly leaning left and men right. In 2022, 50% of Australians voted for a different political party than their partner.

Having different preferences to your partner is a given. But political views can get under our skin in ways that can threaten the entire relationship. So how do you manage, say, if you’re a greenie and your husband is a raging capitalist? What if you’re a carnivore and she’s a vegan? And can you have a fulfilling relationship when you’re misaligned at the ballot box?

Some couples sweep their disagreements under the rug, some couples erupt in heated arguments at dinner parties, while others are pushed to breaking point. Yumi Stynes meets the women who’ve fallen in love across the political divide and how they’ve navigated the highs and lows.

This episode features:

Associate Professor Cynthia Peacock from the University of Alabama

This episode will answer questions like:

How much does politics matter in relationships?
Can you have a great relationship and disagree on politics?
What makes someone more likely to be in a politically dissimilar relationship?
How does politics impact relationships?
Are younger people more likely to be in politically different relationships?
Are people happier if they share the same political views as their partners?

What to listen to next:

Antoinette Lattouf opens up on fight with the ABC

Is your attachment style messing with your love life?

Are men stealing our exercise time?

Family Feuds: Is estrangement the new normal?

Clips

“That’s the price of war”

Choosing partner or community

“If we’re not aligned…”

The "gay name" argument

Doing the relationship math

Kindness as political compass

Transcript preview

First 90 seconds

Speaker 00:00
I'm Edith Vale. And I'm Maureen McGillicuddy. And we host Another Cuppa. It's a darling little program where we natter away with some of Australia's biggest names. Like Pauline Yao. Now, would you like a cuppa?
Yumi Stynes· Host0:11
I would love a cuppa.
Speaker 00:13
How do you take it, love?
Yumi Stynes· Host0:14
Um- As often as possible. [laughs] [laughs] I wish.
Speaker 00:19
Watch Another Cuppa on ABC iview, YouTube, or listen on ABC Listen. Hooro.
Yumi Stynes· Host0:26
[gentle music] ABC Listen: podcasts, radio, news, music, and more.
Susan· Guest0:33
[gentle music] When you wake up and you realize that someone looks at the world like that, you can't unsee it.
Cynthia Peacock· Guest0:42
Is this worth it still? Can I still love this person? Can I still be attracted to this person who thinks this thing?
Susan· Guest0:49
They're very tolerant of me and my beliefs, but that's because I sort of keep most of them to myself.
Cynthia Peacock· Guest0:54
[laughs] Political issues have a lot to do with our identity and the way we see ourselves in the world, what we think is right and wrong, things that are held really closely to what's important to us. It doesn't just feel like a difference of opinion, it feels like we're different people.
Yumi Stynes· Host1:10
[upbeat music] Love is a powerful force that, when manifest in a couple, can withstand aging, sickness, the sight of toenail clippings, and morning breath, apparently. But what about political differences? Can you sustain a romantic

Clips

Transcript preview

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