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E263: How to Have More Fun in Your Relationship

6/4/202657 min

When was the last time you and your partner did something purely for fun? Not productive, not logistical, not about the kids, just fun. If you had to think about it for a beat, you're not alone. Most long-term couples slowly drift from enjoying each other to managing life together, and fun is usually the first thing to quietly disappear. In this episode, we're talking about why couples lose the fun, why it matters way more than most people realize, and 5 surprisingly simple ways to bring it back. 💛 In this episode, you'll hear: Why fun is one of the most underrated forms of intimacy (and how it actually builds resilience, attraction, and friendship) The IG poll results that show just how universal this is. Only 21% of our community said they have a lot of fun in their relationship The most common things that get in the way of fun, from kids and money stress to "we honestly just forget" The reframe that helps you find more time for fun. If you've been feeling more like roommates than romantic partners lately, this episode is a gentle reminder that it’s possible to bring back the fun. 🕯️ Want more fun, connection, and intimacy in your relationship every single month? The Spark is our $9/month subscription designed to keep playfulness, curiosity, and closeness alive in your relationship. Fresh prompts, date ideas, and conversation starters delivered monthly Designed for real couples with real lives, not just the honeymoon phase Easy to fit in, impossible to ignore Only $9/month, less than a latte and way better for your relationship 👉🏻 Check out The Spark here: https://buy.vmtherapy.com/the-spark?utm_term=podcast 🔗 Links & Resources Sex Talks (our book) → https://sextalksbook.com The Ultimate Foreplay Guides → https://vmtherapy.com/foreplay Ultimate Sex Positions → https://vmtherapy.com/ultimatesex 💛 Stay Connected 📸 Follow us on Instagram → https://instagram.com/vanessaandxander 💌 Get our weekly email, real talk, expert tips, and zero shame → https://vmtherapy.com/subscribe 🎧 Subscribe to Pillow Talks wherever you get your podcasts!

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Clips

Transcript preview

First 90 seconds
  1. Vanessa Marin· Host0:00

    I think silliness makes life so much more enjoyable. Like, that's r- that's really some of the most fun times that I have with you, and we're just being s- Absolutely ... like, if you're having a moment where you're like, "If anybody else saw what we are doing and saying together right now, I'd be so embarrassed," like, those are peak moments [laughs] for me. [upbeat music] Hello and welcome to the Pillow Talk Podcast. We're your hosts, Vanessa.

  2. Xander Marin· Host0:29

    And Xander Marin.

  3. Vanessa Marin· Host0:30

    I'm a sex therapist with over 20 years of experience.

  4. Xander Marin· Host0:34

    And I'm just a regular dude. We share the ups and downs in our relationship while giving you step-by-step techniques for improving yours.

  5. Vanessa Marin· Host0:41

    Make sure you subscribe for your weekly double date full of totally doable sex tips, practical relationship advice, hilarious and honest stories of what really goes on behind closed bedroom doors, and so much more. It's the sex education you wish you'd had. Today, we are talking about something that does not get enough attention in relationships.

  6. Xander Marin· Host1:04

    The fact that you start 90% of our episodes with the word today?

  7. Vanessa Marin· Host1:09

    [laughs] [laughs] You try coming up with a fresh intro every single time. Let's make you dance.

  8. Xander Marin· Host1:15

    Let's talk about something that- N- ... we don't talk about very often- [laughs] ... in relationships. This is something- No, no ... that has changed- I think- ... our relationship for the better ...

  9. Vanessa Marin· Host1:23

    I think we... No, no, no.

  10. Xander Marin· Host1:23

    Look at that intro.

  11. Vanessa Marin· Host1:24

    No. We really need to spice things up, so let's have you dance.

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