DHJ434: Curt’s Fleas
12/3/202542 min
Why don’t John and Hank live in the same state? Where does the chapstick go after I apply it? When my phone runs out of battery, why can't I plug it in and immediately use it? If aliens landed on Earth long after the sun has died, would there still be signs of former human life? …Hank and John Green have answers!
If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.
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First 90 secondsHank Green· Host0:01
You're listening to a Complexly podcast. Hello, and welcome to Dear Hank and John.
John Green· Host0:12
Or as I prefer to think of it, Dear John and Hank.
Hank Green· Host0:14
It's a podcast where two brothers answer your questions, give you dubious advice, and bring you all the week's news from both Mars and AFC Wimbledon. John?
John Green· Host0:21
Yeah?
Hank Green· Host0:21
Do you know how an elf blows out a candle?
John Green· Host0:26
I don't.
Hank Green· Host0:26
Just go and (blows).
John Green· Host0:28
W- Why is that funny?
Hank Green· Host0:30
I didn't have a joke ready.
John Green· Host0:32
Oh, it was absurdist humor, like, uh, Dadaist.
Hank Green· Host0:35
(laughs) I don't know. I don't think it was.
John Green· Host0:37
Yeah.
Hank Green· Host0:37
I don't think... If anything it was- Go.
John Green· Host0:39
Marcel Duchamp would have been doubled over with laughter.
Hank Green· Host0:42
It... Well, yeah, I was inverting the frame of the j- joke by, by elves actually, of course, blowing out a candle in the only- Right. ... way that one could.
John Green· Host0:49
Yes.
Hank Green· Host0:50
Yes.
John Green· Host0:50
This reminds me of my all-time favorite joke. It's a knock-knock joke. You start it.
Hank Green· Host0:54
(laughs) This is a good knock-knock.
John Green· Host0:56
Who's there?
Hank Green· Host0:57
(laughs) Okay.
John Green· Host1:00
That's it. I put that joke in Looking for Alaska. (laughs) I always thought it was such a funny joke and- (laughs) I, I first heard it in high school and so- Yeah. ... I thought it would be appropriate for Looking for Alaska. And I cannot tell you over the last 20 years how many emails I have received from people who are like, "I do not get the joke. Please explain the joke to me." (laughs) And I'm like, "Well, I guess it doesn't work that well over text." (laughs) Maybe I should have considered that. There are a number of things- Yeah. ... I regret about my previous novels, but that- Oh, man. ... knock-knock joke is definitely on the list.
Hank Green· Host1:25
No one had, had, had gotten in touch with me before publishing