Are Working Guys In Shidduchim Second Class? The Truth No One Says
5/2/20261 hr 21 min
This episode dives into one of the most talked about trends in the Jewish world right now: Rolex raffles. Are they a creative, effective way to raise money for important causes, or are they feeding into something deeper and more problematic? We unpack the criticism, the psychology behind incentivized giving, and whether intention really matters when it comes to tzedakah. Along the way, the conversation expands into bigger questions about values, culture, and how we balance growth, authenticity, and reality in today's world.
But that's just the surface. This episode also takes a powerful turn into the lives of working guys, those navigating life after yeshiva, and challenges the labels and assumptions placed on them. From shidduchim to identity, from learning vs working to what it really means to be a "Ben Torah," this is an honest, nuanced discussion about responsibility, balance, and redefining success in a way that actually reflects Torah values.
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Clips
Transcript preview
First 90 secondsNachi Gordon· Host0:00
I want to give you an opportunity to speak on what it's like to ruin an entire generation. [laughs] You are the one responsible for these Rolex raffles that we're seeing.
Dov Blumberg· Guest0:09
We have certainly contributed to the fad.
Nachi Gordon· Host0:12
We're teaching our younger generation that in order to give tzedakah, they need to get a Rolex, then you have a chance to win something. We're feeding into a gambling culture.
Dov Blumberg· Guest0:19
You're bringing up how it's maybe a gateway to something. Incentivized giving is incentivized giving. The reality is it's charity, and it's coming from a good place.
Nachi Gordon· Host0:26
The boys that you deal with through Mekar Chaim, they are generally boys who are in the workforce, right?
Dov Blumberg· Guest0:31
Only in the workforce.
Nachi Gordon· Host0:32
Only in the workforce.
Dov Blumberg· Guest0:33
Yeah.
Nachi Gordon· Host0:33
They're working. In Shidduchim, the working boy has this b'dieved label on it. You're not gonna get a ben Torah.
Dov Blumberg· Guest0:38
What is a ben Torah? We have so many catchphrases that we throw around. Are you referring to a guy that's gonna sit and learn all day? Yeah, you're not gonna get a guy that's gonna sit and learn all day because practically, his day is taken up elsewhere. But are you gonna get a guy that is Shomer Torah Umitzvot, halakhah, is finding every second he can to try and connect to Hakadosh Baruch Hu?
Nachi Gordon· Host0:55
You guys- You can find that for sure. Can we make working guys great again? [laughs] What?
Dov Blumberg· Guest0:59
We'll make a red hat. To say that a working guy is a b'dieved is something that goes against Hasiduta. It goes against the fabric of the way Hakadosh Baruch Hu created the world.
Nachi Gordon· Host1:06
Do you think that in a practical way, in 2026, you take a boy who's working a job and a guy who's sitting in yeshiva, that they are looked at as equal? It's a yes or no question.
Dov Blumberg· Guest1:14
If you want me to just answer yes or no, I would say not yet. [laughs] [laughs] I think there's another thing which might get me canceled over here.
Nachi Gordon· Host1:25
Mm.
Dov Blumberg· Guest1:25
Whether you just roll it or edit it out, that- I'm not editing anything. [laughs] But... Okay. So-