Alan Cumming: “I allow people to be abusive!” How to build self-worth and say no
5/28/202651 min
Alan Cumming's dad told him he was worthless, and his mum told him he was precious. Figuring out how he feels about himself has been a life’s work.
In this chat with Fearne, Alan’s open about the ways he’s allowed people to treat him badly, and how he’s learnt to get comfortable with confrontation and setting boundaries. He also explains why the rage in the script of his new TV show triggered painful childhood memories.
Fearne and Alan share their experiences of oscillating between relentless, excited creativity (constantly manifesting bigger and better jobs) and a desire to rest (Alan’s fantasies about becoming a tradwife...!)
Plus, what really happens on the Traitors’ set and how on earth does Alan manage to keep that poker face all the time?
Alan will be creatively involved in four different productions at the Pitlochry Festival Theatre this year, and you can watch Alan in Channel 4’s new show Tip Toe from May 31st.
If you liked this episode of Happy Place, you might also like:
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Clips
Transcript preview
First 90 secondsFearne Cotton· Host0:00
[gentle music] Hello, a massive welcome back to Happy Place with me, Fern Cotton. This is the show that looks back in order to move forward. Today, I'm chatting to Alan Cumming.
Alan Cumming· Guest0:12
I mean, truly, my dad told me I was worthless and my mom told me I was precious. And of course, you want to believe your mom more. [laughs] I am a strong person, and I, I function very well for someone who has, had an abusive childhood, I think. But I- it's still with me. Sometimes I, I can get triggered by certain personalities. I will allow people to be, well, abusive. I had those things happen to me that I am acknowledging were really damaging and could have ended it for me, but I, yeah, I persevered because I believed in myself, I think.
Fearne Cotton· Host0:45
Do you know what? This was one of those chats that me and the Happy Place team were so buzzed about. We're all huge Alan fans. And weirdly, we recorded this one in the evening. We very rarely do that. We're all, we're all early birds at Happy Place. We're morning people, so we may bash out three Happy Place podcast episodes in a day, but we'll usually start at, like, 9:00. This one, I think we started recording at, like, 6:00 or 7:00 in the evening. Really weird for me, but sort of lovely. It was almost like we were on a night out with Alan Cumming, and it had a different feel to it for me, certainly. Like we were having, like, a late night. It wasn't late night, but for me it was, cheeky chat. And he had, he brought such good energy to the studio in a fun, like, little behind-the-scenes