A Fight About Who’s Allowed To Have A Crush
4/17/202659 min
Is having a crush the secret to a happy relationship, or the gateway drug to a ruinous affair? We can’t agree. Meanwhile, comedian Nikki Glaser says that sexual cheating is a turn-on and emotional cheating is a no-no. Who’s right, who’s deluded, and who should just be single, according to Emily Vernem?
Plus, enthusiasm for hobbies is at an-all time high, but why does it feel like men get all the good ones, while women get the leftovers of leisure? Holly Wainwright talks about her life-changing gardening habit, but acknowledges it’s first to go when life gets busy. So what’s an untouchable 'Sovereign Hobby', and how do we get one?
And, there is an unofficial list of things women do to look like they have their shit together, and it involves everything from keeping whites white, to having enough coathangers, to knowing what stock is. Clare Stephens just wishes she could remember the snacks.
TV RECCOS SPECIAL
- Clare’s watching: DTF St. Louis on HBO Max. A dark, nonlinear comedy about a love triangle, a dating app for married people, and David Harbour being incredibly likable.
- Holly’s watching: Riot Women on SBS. Created by Happy Valley’s Sally Wainwright, it’s a brilliant look at five middle-aged women who decide to form a punk band.
- Em’s watching: Margo’s Got Money Troubles on Apple TV. Starring Elle Fanning, Michelle Pfeiffer, and Nick Offerman, it’s the story of a college dropout navigating new motherhood and mounting bills.
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What To Listen To Next:
- Listen to our latest episode: Mia's Uncomfortable Aha Moment About Friendship
- Listen: A Podcast Feud & Hanging Out With Prince Harry
- Listen: She's Back! Mia Confronts Rival Anne Stephens On 'Nana Rules'
- Listen: Quick Question: Why Are You So Annoying?
- Listen: 'The Chatbot History That Ruined My Relationship’
- Listen: Mia & Amelia On The Cheating Drama Everyone’s Talking About
- Listen: The Hollywood Star Who Hates Everyone
- Listen: Mia & Anne Stephens: A Nana Leaderboard
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What to read:
- Elle Fanning's brilliant new TV show is smart, sincere and occasionally sexy.
- Put away your oversized blazer. This is what stylish women are wearing in 2026.
- Nikki Glaser met her boyfriend on set in 2013. They've broken up five times since.
- 'Old-school hobbies are back. These 6 to try with your kids will convert you.'
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CREDITS:
Hosts: Holly Wainwright, Clare Stephens & Emily Vernem
Group Executive Producer: Ruth Devine
Executive Producer: Sasha Tannock
Video Producer: Josh Green
Junior Content Producer: Tessa Kotowicz
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Clips
Transcript preview
First 90 secondsHolly Wainwright· Host0:00
Hello, and welcome to Mamamia Out Loud. It's what women are actually talking about on Friday, the 17th of April. I'm Holly Wainwright.
Claire Stephens· Host0:08
I'm Claire Stephens.
Em Burnham· Host0:09
And I'm Em Burnham.
Holly Wainwright· Host0:10
And here's what's on our Friday agenda. Do you need a hobby?
Em Burnham· Host0:15
Yes.
Holly Wainwright· Host0:15
Probably yes. [laughs] [laughs] There you go. You've got some, I think.
Em Burnham· Host0:19
Uh- Or maybe...
Holly Wainwright· Host0:20
Eh, we'll get to that ...
Em Burnham· Host0:20
we'll get to it.
Holly Wainwright· Host0:21
Welcome to the intense hobby era and why they can sometimes feel really hard to get.
Em Burnham· Host0:28
Plus, an unofficial list of the things women do to make it look like they have their shit together. We discuss.
Claire Stephens· Host0:35
Yes. And not one, but three TV shows to watch this weekend or over the long weekend next weekend if you get- Yeah, not everybody's getting it- If you get it ...
Holly Wainwright· Host0:44
because Anzac Day's a Saturday this year, some states capitulated to giving everybody the Monday off and some states kept it pure.
Claire Stephens· Host0:53
Absolutely unacceptable.
Holly Wainwright· Host0:54
Did Victoria keep it pure? Because they get way too many public holidays. [laughs] [laughs] I'm just gonna say it right now.
Claire Stephens· Host0:58
They can, they can sacrifice one.
Holly Wainwright· Host0:59
Sorry to all the Victorians listening- [laughs] ... take it up with Emily Burnham.
Claire Stephens· Host1:03
Sorry.
Holly Wainwright· Host1:04
But first, Claire Stephens.
Claire Stephens· Host1:06
This week we all came across a piece on the cart called The Secret to a Great Marriage: Crushes on Other People by EJ Dixon. And I, in hindsight, we were all a little bit too enthusiastic- [laughs] [laughs] [laughs] ... about this headline. We were all praise emojis and like, "Yes, oh, I love this, love this." And I think that's something for us to interrogate