284. Hear Me Out: How Understanding Accents—Ours & Others—Improves Communication
4/27/202625 min
Understanding the accent you didn’t know you had.
Whether communicating in our mother tongue or practicing a new language, we all speak with an accent. But that’s not all, says Valerie Fridland — we hear with an accent as well.
Fridland is a professor of sociolinguistics at the University of Nevada, Reno, and author of Why We Talk Funny: The Real Story Behind Our Accents. According to her, we don’t just sound a certain way, we hear a certain way too, affecting how we understand others. “We’re hearing with an accent — a bias shaped by our own language and experience,” she says. But instead of expecting others’ communication to fit our preconceptions, Fridland says to meet people halfway. “If we want to make communication successful, it’s not just their job as a speaker, it’s my job as a listener.”
In this episode of Think Fast, Talk Smart, Fridland and host Matt Abrahams discuss how empathetic listening opens the door to understanding. Whether you’re communicating in a context of mutual intelligibility or attempting to bridge cultural and linguistic divides, Fridland’s insights show how connection is a collaboration — shaped by accents on both sides of the conversation.
To listen to the extended Deep Thinks version of this episode, please visit FasterSmarter.io/premium.
Episode Reference Links:
- Valerie Fridland
- Valerie’s Book: Why We Talk Funny
- Ep.91 Um, Like, So: How Filler Words Can Create More Connected, Effective Communication
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- Matt Abrahams >>> LinkedIn
Chapters:
- (00:00) - Introduction
- (02:32) - The Role of Filled Pauses
- (04:56) - When Fillers Become a Problem
- (06:18) - Why We Don’t Hear Our Own Accent
- (07:43) - Language Rhythm & Intonation
- (12:33) - Listening with an Accent
- (17:31) - The Final Three Questions
- (24:13) - Conclusion
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Clips
Transcript preview
First 90 secondsMatt Abrahams· Host0:00
Hi, Matt here. I wanted to remind you that for each episode, we provide English language learning support where we share useful information to help you develop your English skills. Check out these English language learning and other resources, along with our newsletter and deep dive videos at fastersmarter.io under Resources. Now a word from our sponsors. Their support covers the cost of production, allowing us to bring you this episode free of charge. Know that I only recommend products I truly believe in. [swoosh] If you've listened to the show for a while, you know I am all about clear, effective communication, especially in writing, emails, and documents. All of these influence how we show up professionally. But writing well consistently isn't always easy, especially when you're moving fast. To help me communicate more clearly and efficiently, I've been a longtime user of Superhuman Email and Grammarly. So I was genuinely excited to see them come together as part of Superhuman. Superhuman is an AI productivity suite that brings together Grammarly, Coda, and Superhuman Mail, so the support you need shows up right where you're already working. It helps you refine your tone, sharpen your message, and sound like your best self without all the effort or second guessing. It's a powerful way to elevate both your communication and your presence. Unleash your superhuman potential with AI that meets you where you work. Learn more at superhuman.com. That's superhuman.com.